Scars and All

(Even the Imperfections Are Part of Beautiful You)

Hey, writerly types! I just finished reading the Yours Cruelly, Elvira book by Cassandra Peterson, and she closed the book with this little tidbit that really made me think: "We all have our scars. Let them be a blessing and not a curse."

That got me thinking about the "scars" that make us who we are and how that works into our writing. 

Are you the kind of writer who has a "writer self" separate from your "normal self" -- i.e. is the writer a persona you put on, or do you use the whole of who you are both while writing and in person (at cons, signings, etc.)? Why do you think that is?

Mari Hersh-Tudor: Of necessity, I view the world through a number of different lenses. My work persona is wholly separate from the rest of my identity, which contains, but is not limited to: Writer Gremlin, Cosplay Demon, Fiber Artist and 2-D Artist who live together, Mom/Grandma, Occasional Musical Genius, Cat Whisperer, Really Good Cook, and Oh Look Squirrel.

Honestly my head is pretty crowded and there’s a lot of scampering back and forth in there.

As for Why, I was raised in a very restrictive environment where I had to excise the unacceptable parts of me for public presentation. I kept them and they grew into New Me selves that I kept in my head.

Bobby Nash: I’m pretty much me. What you see if what you get. Don’t get me wrong, when I’m working as Author Bobby, I put my best foot forward and act in a professional manner. What I don’t do is pretend to be something I’m not. I have enough trouble keeping up with who I am. Trying to keep up with a false identity as well seems like a lot of work. The last thing I want to do is give myself more work. I never really put a lot of debate into it. I’m just me. This is who I am.How have both the good and bad events in your life influenced your work? Are there hardships or traumas (that you are okay to discuss in this interview) that you've found made you a better writer? What about good times or happy events that have made you a better writer?

Paul Landri: I don't see myself so much as a "writer." More like a guy who writes if that makes sense.

I don't have a persona any more than I do when I'm voice Acting or doing my day job. When I market my work I tend to take the Stan Lee approach and be a stout cheerleader for my projects to the point of annoyance. Everything is the biggest, the best, the most thrilling thing you've ever read and if you don't read it the whole world will explode! 

Lisa Barker: I'm guessing that I am the same person/persona when writing, doing writing related things, and when not. However, I do take on my characters when I am writing and they are distinct and for the most part strictly tapped into and expressed when and in writing, though I took on mannerisms of my main character from Inheritance that I noticed in real life. Why to all of that? I'm an authentic person so I am the same me that writes as the me you would meet on the street. As for the mannerisms . . . I get really involved in my work, lol.

Sam Kelley: No. My writer self and “normal” self (whatever that means ahaha) are the same person. I grew up writing. My older characters are part of me. We grew up together. I know some of them better than I know myself. There has never been a time that I was active on social media that I wasn’t talking about OCs (the same exactly ones I talk about online now, for the most part lol).

Sean Taylor: I hope I don't. I really try to be as opening "me" in my work as I am in my day-to-day life. Most people who know me for even a few minutes, I like to think. Sure, they may think there is more to me than they can learn in a few minutes of our meeting, but all the real, true, deep stuff is there. The rest is just details. I try to write like that too, dumping my beliefs and heart and deep thinking into my work, even when if that work is mainly surface-level action or adventure stories. 

How have both the good and bad events in your life influenced your work? Are there hardships or traumas (that you are okay to discuss in this interview) that you've found made you a better writer? What about good times or happy events that have made you a better writer?

Sam Kelley: My characters go through a lot. When I first started writing, I was only 11. When I started writing what later became my debut series, I was 13. I hadn’t gone through much trauma or hardship (besides growing up poor) at that point. But, as I got older, my situation changed, and some things that happened to me were eerily similar to things my characters went through. It sucks, but it definitely helped me to be a better writer (in the sense that the characters & their reactions to situations feel a lot more grounded and realistic than they were originally). Good times have influenced my writing too, but in smaller moments, so it seems less noticeable to me.

Lisa Barker: Growing up with an alcoholic mother who thought she was psychic and wanted to train me as well as control me, set me up perfectly to write my debut novel. I wrote about an adult child of alcoholics without realizing I was one or that my character was one until the editing process was complete. My relationship with my mother also made me keenly observant and I think that makes me a good writer. Bipolar disorder made me a mood writer. Before I was medicated or stable, I could write from depression or melancholy; mania drove me to write around the clock, sometimes not sleeping for days. Now, after over a decade of stability, life is good, but writing has eluded me. I don't have a well spring of the abyss to draw upon, so I have to write in the immediacy of being hurt emotionally, and that is not a likely occurrence. Writing has become more cerebral than intuitive (and that makes producing work excruciating). Unless I can find a way to connect emotionally with my characters, which is how I live and breathe as a writer, I am impotent so I am still figuring it out and journaling seems to be helping with that as well as reading other people's books. To get to the point, positive events and a general sense of positivity and well-being have been great for my life, but has had a negative impact on my writing and I am figuring it out.

Paul Landri: I lost my dad when I was 25 years old. Bad age to lose a parent when you're still trying to figure things out. He does suddenly and it was a shock. Because of this I tend to like to give my characters happy endings. It doesn't happen all the time because real life is messy but if I can pit my characters through hell, the least they can get is a little peace. 

Bobby Nash: There are real-life instances that influence my work. Absolutely. It can be little things like experiences at work, on a date, at a con, or getting a speeding ticket. All of those can translate into character moments. Real people and their attitudes, both good and bad, can be a starting point for building a character or situation. Trauma works. Lost a loved one? That gives you a point of reference for writing a character that’s lost a loved one, for example. Use those things, if you’re comfortable doing so. Sometimes, writing them down can be therapeutic. A nice bonus.

Sean Taylor: I sometimes face situation depression (as opposed to clinical), and there are still wounds that sting from time to time, such as when I was let go from the religious organization I used to work for that really defined my identity for a lot of years and left me struggling to figure out who I was afterward. However, struggling through that post-religious work "me" was something that my writing was able to help me work through -- and sharp readers will notice that in my work: questioning, doubts, identity issues, that sort of thing. 

Mari Hersh-Tudor: Everything is fair game. Everything. Even if I’m only observing it happen to someone else, it’s Story Fodder. This online discussion is fair game.

Have you ever thought to "hide" a part of who you are when you write? Maybe an upbringing that doesn't mesh with your current beliefs or a trauma that you'd prefer not to reveal (even subtly through your work) to readers?

Sean Taylor: Of course I do. There are still deeper parts of me that I don't reveal blatantly -- think that wouldn't go over well with my MeMe and Mom, where they still alive, and that's a part of my faith upbringing I still struggle with most likely. It's there in the work, but it's deep and incredibly subtle. However, the more of an ally to the marginalized I seek to become, even some of that is beginning to bubble to the surface. What kind of things? Well, that's for you to find in my work. 

Bobby Nash: Not really. I mean, I do write things that I never personally encountered also. I use what’s best for the story. The only way the audience knows if it’s truly a personal belief or trauma is if I tell them in interviews or in the book. I will also add that I’ve added things to stories that were very personal, but no one knows it because I have never said it aloud. We don’t have to share everything.

Ef Deal: I am so caught up with health issues right now, I can't even begin to answer except with this one example: beginning at age 15, I began to be molested by a man well respected in the community, even honored as a legend, which I supposed in many ways he was. When I told my priest, he said it was God's will and to bear the trial. When I suggested it (a friend of mine) to my mom, she said the girl probably deserved it, but men were like that. I kept my mouth shut until I was 18 and went to college to discover that no, it was not normal. Then I discovered I was not the only girl in my situation with this man, but the other girls just shrugged and said, "Forget it. It happened. He's dead now. It won't change anything. But it changed ME. Last year I was invited by Speculation Publications to contribute to their Grimm Retold anthology, and I found my perfect catharsis in reinventing Fitcher's Birds into "Fitcher's Chick." It is raw, it may be triggering for some women, but it is in essence true in every sense of the word. And I feel GREAT and grateful that I could finally breathe.

Sam Kelley: Not really, no. I have no problem exploring rather intense subjects in my work. Writing my characters navigating situations that are similar or comparable (albeit often worse) to things I’ve experienced has helped me process negative emotions. I am a bit more pragmatic or pessimistic than the stories I tend to write (as I like to give my characters a generally happy end after all of the horrors they experience).

Paul Landri: I don't hide anything in my writing because what's the fun in that? If Stephen King has the courage to write about even a fraction of the stuff he does (under the influence or sober) then why should I or anyone else hide anything they want to put out there if it means a good story? 

Mari Hersh-Tudor: I’m not consciously writing myself into my work so I never considered it before, but now that you mention it, the idea is a good story prompt.

Lisa Barker: The only thing I have noted that I'd hide and not incorporate into my writing are the "current events" of my life which are the present fears and events of my life. The problem I am having when I try to write these days is that I'm not drawing from a murky pool of melancholy, writing about things I won't understand until I've done some developmental editing on myself (therapy, self-education); instead I am conscious of what these things are about and where they come from and precisely what that means. Thinking about that now, this could be really good for me as a writer, but it's as if the old way of writing was like creating my own static electricity and that was a great magic show, but now I have lightening bolts at my disposal that I can fire at will with deadly precision. What the hell do I do now?! Phenomenal Cosmic Power . . . itty bitty living space.

How much do your (use your own definitions for these words) positive and negative traits and interests influence who you are as a writer and the stories you create?

Mari Hersh-Tudor: Writing is excellent catharsis. If your subconscious won’t let go of something, it’s telling you that you have things to work out, and the keyboard is a good place to start.

Lisa Barker: Now that is what I am going to find out after this year of reading and journaling. I feel like what I have to write is a "tell all". Maybe journal writing will suffice. Maybe I'll write a memoir. I'd like to believe that I can still write fiction and now have the maturity to handle that act. It will be really cool finding out.

On the positive side, a lively imagination can take you down rabbit holes no matter what you’re doing. So what if they don’t pan out? A healthy “cut file” can still spark ideas when you need them.

Bobby Nash: I try to imbue characters with the traits that help define them. No one is 100% good or bad, positive or negative. Even Doctor Doom loves his mother. As writers, we dig deep into our own emotions and experiences, but we’re also natural people watchers. I learn a lot from watching other people and finding traits that work for characters that aren’t like me. Again, both positive and negative.

Sam Kelley: The characters in my debut series all contain elements of me (my traits and thought patterns) in them. Many of those traits are dramatized or exaggerated, often pushed to extremes, and many of my characters have mental illnesses or conditions either I have or someone close to me has (anxiety, ADHD, BPD, etc). I’m careful to keep the characters grounded and complex (developing them for 15 years helps with creating a rounded character lol), but it’s an interesting way to explore both the positive and negative of the human experience and how relationships form and play out between characters with certain traits. Psychology fascinates me, which might be why I like writing stories focused on the characters themselves (rather than plot-driven by external forces).

Paul Landri: I'm a lazy bones when it comes to writing. It seems like a chore up until I sit down and get going, then I can't stop myself. I lay the foundation of the story and my coauthor fleshes out the rest. It's a good system because I do the broad strokes and he adds the finishing touches.

I love dialogue and I love dramatic narratives. When I can marry the two it really is a match made in heaven.

Sean Taylor: I work them all in, but some are more blatant than others. I often attribute my negative characteristics (or characteristics I'm trying to overcome or have overcome) to my characters who are either "villains" or "trying to be better people." I see my good qualities in a more idealized way, and try not to use those too liberally because writing them that way can make my "heroes" seem like they don't have feet of clay, and I don't believe that at all.